Hyperventilation Monologue

I write amidst the cold of the frozen air confined in a room where the clicks and ticks are audible but the voices are soft and fading; the illuminating screen glows in the circles behind our eyelids. This is the world I came to unknowingly.

Five months past…

Who would know it could last? That this room could be home to the soul that has searched far and wide. That refuge is here for the tired and hopeless. That a chance is given here so that the ones who failed may find gear to fight their coward.

But life is a surprise. Always it is.

You see there is courage when you feel weak and alone in the company of yourself. You borrow your own guards and eat your own weakness. Turn them into your own strengths that are yours and only.

And the chills may fade like leaves have decayed but you shall remain in the hopefulness of the morning like you did through the tick-tocks of the olden days not so long ago.

You shall be great. You already are.

Think of all the tides there have been in your sailing and think more about how the boat has crossed the storm.

Not how you suffered but how you healed.

 

Not the fire in the path that burnt your sole

But the gasp of air that kept you breathing. still.

Not what you left,

But what’s there left.

Not nothing.

I will walk the thousand miles going that far.

I will remember.

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